Well....things went really well today! We signed for Full Disclosure and we will be reading their files for as long as it takes. They are very extensive! After we are finished with reading and discussing things with their providers, then we will give our acceptance of the boys. It is definitely going to be a long road. We are thrilled to be a part of their lives for as long as the Lord will allow! Thank you for praying. We got past the first hurdle which was just making it to the meeting. Please continue to pray for all the details that we can't even discuss. We could really tell people were praying! PS the boys are really cute!!!

Love, Jenny for the whole family

Pre- meeting blog

We are definitely nervous! Maybe they will call tomorrow and tell us the meeting is canceled. I hope not! Yet....I find myself already trying to protect my heart. "Maybe the court date in December won't go through," "maybe they will find a relative to take the boys," "maybe they will decide they changed their minds," " maybe God has decided these are not the boys for us," maybe..... The 'maybes' are there to protect my heart.

My wonderful husband has already informed me that if these boys make it into our home, there is no protecting our hearts! Isn't that what hurts the most about love? You love and cannot see what love will look like later. Love may be taking care of these boys for a season--literally--and then love may be praying for them later as they are wrenched out of my arms only to be placed somewhere else. And still, we love. We have the command to love in John 15.17: "This is my commandment that you love one another. " Don't we get to choose whom we will love? Most of the time, yes! But, then there are those other times when you are commanded to love. This is one of those times when we are being commanded to love and loving just happens to be so easy.

Please pray for my fragile heart. I really never wanted to adopt this way. This wasn't what I had planned and yet, here I am following God's leading. I see God's hand on this in so many ways! Yet, seeing God's hand now may be to help me walk through that door. And later, He will say, this is exactly where I wanted you! Maybe even despair--dare I say that? We are sometimes found there, too, with God's voice clearly saying--"walk through this door, too!"

This weekend I found myself reflecting again on the depravity of my heart. Once again mourning the sinfulness in me. All it did though was remind me of why I am adopting these boys. Any flaw they have can't compare to the flaw in my soul. They and I need a Saviour!

And, here I end praying, Please God, protect my heart!!

Thank you everyone for praying today! Our meeting went really well, I guess one could say..... We are very excited that we did decide in the meeting to go ahead with Full Disclosure. This means that we will get to read the boys' files completely. We will get to talk to their foster parents and any other adult involved in their care. We are still very new of course to all these procedures and timelines but we will tell you as much as we can as to how this all plays out!

First off, it will be a miracle from God if we do get these children, in the same that some of you have birthed healthy children. Second, our next meeting is coming up--October 27th-- After this, we do not know when the children will get to visit us. We do know that you start with small visits and work up to weekend visits and then they come and stay with you. Third, this will not be a quick process by any means, nothing could even possibly be completed until next summer at the earliest. Fourth, we are not allowed to discuss any specific details regarding the boys history at this time.

Shiloh and I are very excited still--if not more so now--after getting to learn a little more about these little boys. We are also very much more aware of how delicate this whole process of adoption is and how important it is that we trust it completely to God and not anyone or any procedure!

Here's how you can pray, without giving you too much information. We ask for wisdom as we review the boys' lives this next month and into November. The point here is that this is a life changing decision for us and our family. Then, we ask for each of the court dates and evaluations to go on in a timely fashion. There is also another sibling (sister) involved that we would ask you to pray for as well. Just pray as you are led! We are committed to going ahead with these young boys as far as the Lord allows. Our hearts deeply hope it will be forever! We hope and pray that they will become a permanent part of our home--and we haven't even seen them yet--not even a picture!! This is all of God.

I did not know how much love was left in my heart for the children that God had for us (ie maybe these 2 boys!). I knew in my head that I would love them but today was the first day that it was actually realized (in my heart). It's just the same as when you have your second child, wondering if you will love him or her as much as you did the first. You realize your heart opens bigger to let them in. It just keeps on getting bigger and bigger. You realize that with a bigger heart becomes more of a chance to get hurt, too. But, you go ahead and take that second child and third and now 6th and 7th for us! You take them with all the joy and with all the pain that they may bring. Pain of leaving, pain of rebelling, pain of seeing them hurt, pain of the effort to raise them.....but the gift of getting to love them. Only God has given us this love. Please pray that we we remember this in the nitty gritty of this life with children! And, of course, we ask that you pray that we would get to adopt these little boys--all with the overarching understanding that it is in the Lord's will.

Thank you!!! Thank you also for everyone who said they would pray. It was amazing how we felt them! I've heard people say this and this is one of those times, we really did feel the prayers!!

Ephesians 1.5 & 6 "He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will, to the praise of the glory of His Grace....."

Just got another call! I was told it would be 3 weeks before we could have a meeting. Now, the meeting is next Thursday, October 8th, at 1.30!!!! Please pray for us now and then and that the decision would be made clear to us!

Thank you dear friends!!

Jennifer and Shiloh

Well, we had not heard anything until.......On Sunday, I told 2 friends to pray that the social worker would call me with news. I haven't really "bugged" her. I was about to though. :) Instead I asked some of my friends who are adoptive parents , to pray. I imagine they did. Then, on Tuesday I got an "out of area" call....I had enough hope to answer it (since the state calls are blocked) and it was Sandy---our social worker in the next step of this process)......but the latest is.......the same.....2 boys are still available. We are just waiting to hear on our meeting time with the 8!!!! social workers that have to be there at the first meeting. I guess it's 4 social workers and each of their supervisors. We meet for about an hour to just get to hear a little more about the boys. We can't know everything but we get to go home and decide if we would like to proceed with them. If we do, then it's starts the whole procedure. We would get what's called Full Disclosure. We would be able to read their files and hear about all their disabilities, past history, etc.... So, please pray that the decision would be clear. We need to know if these are the boys that God has chosen for us. Practically speaking, we need to see if we can add their needs into our family. We want to take care of boys who no longer have a family and maybe these are them. It's hard not to get too excited!! However.....even if we get them, we start the process and God allows them to be taken from us....I KNOW He has a good plan. I know He will take care of them and of us! We are confident in this.

I Corinthians 13.7-8 Love knows no limit to its endurance, no end to its trust, no fading of its hope; it can outlast anything. Love still stands when all else has fallen.

Please pray for the boys, for our meeting to get scheduled and for the choice to be clear (for a yes or a no).